Saturday, 21 January 2012

Chapter II - as it relates to our daughter & our lives

Micaela is a lovely - wonderful - chirpy little lady - 3 1/2 years old now - just reflecting how time just - melts away - when Nick started J.K. in 2010 - she was just 2 - for her - a Wonderful Stage....

& today's post - isn't about her changing - from that Wonderful Stage or her full of Pepper self - but about another necessary evil - during our early journey with Autism~~~

This time around ~ it isn't with the same ignorance - this time around....
just the sight of these words = such pain in my heart!

*but I just read about how we grieve - as parents of children who might not be what we envisioned - for how our hopes, dreams & expectations for our children change when there is an official "Label" or Diagnosis - how we feel we have to grieve the loss of this version of the child we know today - I don't know if I ever used that word for how we felt with Nicolas - in hindsight - I sure hope not - it isn't that we lose her or a part of her or even expectations of how life looks or looked before any interpretation of an Early Screening or further into these questions - into an actual assessment - it is about not having known a bit sooner - (for Nick especially) but even now with Mica - just a bit more confident sooner than here & now - that there was just something, or perhaps - just "Nothing"?

Last year it was just exploring the kinds of things that had us questioning our challenges with Nicolas.
This year - it is beyond our understanding that Micaela would have enough similar traits (both positive & negative) - or **Flags** which have moved us to take action - it may be to just to allay our fears & although not "unfounded" - but yes indeed our suspicions....

Several people have suggested that Mica could be "mirroring" her brother's symptoms or traits...
but after compiling a list - we are now under the sincere impression that it is more than this - even if it isn't quite the same as Nicolas's diagnosis - we believe that we will need support to understand what is going on ~ &/or how we can move forward & work forward.

1 comment:

  1. I don't have kids, but I would guess that parents sort of learn as they go with child #1. So when child #2 comes along, you're more aware of things and quicker to act if you sense there's something that needs attention.

    I'm not too familiar with autism, but I hope your kids are able to overcome the challenges it brings and accomplish great things.